This insider wrote earlier about the formation of a new Christian Movie Studio dedicated to creating films that preach the word and make money. Their first effort, Starsky and Christ, is now in pre-production. Here is the second film slated for a greenlight.

Punchdrunk Passion. A shy, hesitant Jesus, played by Adam Sandler-Smith) desperately woos the brazen village vixen, Mary Magdalene (Selma Hayek). He tries impressing her with parlour tricks like multiplying loaves and fishes, healing lepers and raising from the dead Mary’s old boyfriend, Big Laz, who had o’d’d on hash during a debauched wedding at Cana. Mary finally realizes she loves Jesus and runs to Golgotha to tell him, but Roman soldiers prevent her from doing so before he dies. Film is based on the Gnostic gospel of Mary of Magdalena, The Empowerment Of Magdalene, which archeologists found in the ruins of a lesbian bookstore in Nazarus. At last a story from the woman’s POV, in which Jesus’ last words are the poignant, “Mary, why did you stand me up?”