When Rush Limbaugh learned that someone had thrown paint on a billboard advertising his show on the Jones Falls Expressway in Baltimore, he joked that the incident should warrant him secret service protection as was granted Barack Obama when Rush’s Barack the Magic Negro parody made more news than it should have.

Hate crime in progress

Forget secret service protection, Rush! This is a hate crime and you need your fuzzball self to be included in the recently passed House bill H.R. 1592, the Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevention Act of 2007. The bill should be amended so that federal protection includes race, color, religion, national origin, sexual orientation, gender, gender identity, disability and Rush Limbaugh.

Rush’s defaced face is a perfect example of a hate crime. Moreover, it was compound-interest hate when the official for the Department of Public Works, a Robert Murrow, tipped off the Baltimore Sun about it and said “It looks great. It does my heart good.”

Dead Ordinary Victim

Deader Hate Crime Victim

There is no need to explain to decent, loving, thought controlling people why hate crime legislation is so necessary. Autopsies reveal that a person shot because of his race or color was likely to be twice as dead as a person who was shot because he got caught in a drive-by. A dead person killed because he was sexually “enhanced” is unable to enjoy sex at a rate three times greater than a someone killed because he hooked up with his brother’s wife. Doctors report that the average stabbing victim experiences fifty percent less pain than a gay person stabbed because he was gay. Hateful graffiti on mosques and synagogues are more difficult to remove than anonymous graffiti on subway trains by a factor of twelve.

Hate is irrational and Rush haters are as irrational as they come. They hate that he’s uppity enough to disagree with them. They hate him enough to throw paint at his picture instead of discussing their differences. Today paint, tomorrow what? A pie? Tomatoes?

“Hate,” as George Bernard Shaw said, “is the coward’s revenge for being intimidated.” Rush needs to be protected by law. Add him to the list of hate victims in House Bill H.R. 1592 and send a message to Rush haters everywhere. Meanwhile, dittoheads can just sit back, relax and enjoy the show.