Felons Unite. Get off your bunk, put down those yard weights, stop work on your new shank and join FFA, Felons For Amnesty and fight for the right to have your crimes forgiven and forgotten. This means every burglary, mugging, theft, hijack or drug sale you’ve ever been indicted for. Our goal is to give us a fresh start burgling, mugging, thieving, hijacking, dope dealing and the biggie, drunk driving and manslaughter. Unfortunately, people are currently a bit touchy about you rapists and pedophiles, but that’s what we have sanctuary cities for.

FFA Headquarters

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I have to admit that when I learned that upcoming failed presidential candidate, Michael Bloomberg, who is also the nanny mayor of New York, is instituting a program to pay people to do what they’re supposed to do as productive people and citizens I just about hit the roof.

Nanny Bloomy wants to dole out payments for kids to attend class, take tests, do homework, stay drug free; for parents to attend PTA meetings, get birth control and educate themselves on how not to shoot them and their families in the foot by behaving stupidly.

Damn! I wish that was around when I was a kid, or when my kids were kids. I’d be writing this from a villa in Italy.

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So much is being said across the country about this final episode of The Sopranos.

When it ended, when that screen suddenly turned to black, I was pulled off my seat, which I had been sitting on the edge of throughout. And then, when I saw the credits, I felt …. satisfied. It was almost palpable, this feeling of… what? … rightness.

I said to my wife that a lot of people are going to be pissed. At least surprised. That’s certainly the case as everyone is deconstructing the episode’s meaning. However, analyzing this episode, the series, Chase himself is, IMO, futile. We saw what we saw and it pleased us or it didn’t. End of story. Just like the episode. It was what it was.

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My solution to the illegal immigrant problem is fairly straight forward and it goes something like this: If people and companies with a few extra bucks can adopt a highway, why not use the same program to adopt an Hispanic?

Not just any Hispanic. I mean any illegal Hispanic living in the States who finds himself in need of a taxpayer funded service of any kind — schooling, hospitalization, welfare or food stamps. Instead of the financial burden falling on those of us whose parents and grandparents came here legally, a sensitive, liberal, touchy-feely, caring person or family can dig into their savings to provide whatever Government service their adopted illegal might need.

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